Tense people are hardly any fun to be around. You don't smile, you can't let loose, you take everything so seriously, and you try to project this sophisticated, professional image around the very person you're supposed to be able to loosen up around. No wonder the energy around the two of you is always so tense and unfriendly. When we place so much emphasis on the reverence and sacredness of something, it ultimately fails to make it fun, and that's what we have done to our marriages and relationships. We have made them so restrictive; they have lost that fun sparkle. Well, it's not too late.
Have a Friendship with Your Partner: I would hope that you at least like, if not love, the one you're with, because to have an open, honest, and fun relationship, you must like and love the person you're with. You should have a friendship. It's the one thing that's bound to see your relationship to the end of time. After you've lived, and done, and had, all you will have left is each other. The sexiness of your relationship then will depend mostly on what you have left to give to each other - and that's friendship. Find it now before it's too late!
Be Open to the Possibilities:The possibilities in a relationship full of love and friendship are endless! Explore the possibilities together. Live outside the restrictive box a little. Be flirtatious, take a trip together, go where you've always wanted to go, but most importantly, be prepared for the ups and downs. Stick together when times are hard, and laugh together when times are good. There's a reason why someone created those "for better or worse" vows.
Be open to the possibility that there will be times when your man will be out of work and you may need to pick up the slack. If you can't stick together through the hard times, then there's no point in even trying. Break All the "Rules" This is especially necessary in many African relationships. Somehow, over the years, men and women have found a way to erect boundaries between the genders.
These barriers feed into the restrictions that currently exist in many of our relationships: a woman is not supposed to do that, a man is supposed to do it like this, a woman is not allowed to do it or say it like that. No wonder many couples seem so tense around each other. They can't laugh at themselves within their own marriage. Break those rules and do the dishes together. Then do it on the counter-top after you're done.
Break those rules and watch the soccer game with him and his buddies. Then do it on the couch after his buddies have left. Who cares what they think; that he allowed his woman to sit among men and scream inappropriate words at the screen? After they're gone, all you have left is each other.
There is Nothing "Bad" about Being a Bad Girl: Flirt with your man. Let him know what you're thinking, what you want, what you desire. Speak with confidence and let the "bad" in you shine forth as frequently as possible. Conservatism borne out of strict religious discipline is fine sometimes, but the one place they don't need to be is in your relationship. Forget everything your mama taught you about sex, men and your place in relation to the two.
Take control, make the first move, create romantic scenes, take your man by surprise, play with his senses, create mystery. Know when to play the part. If you find yourself hesitating, remember, it is those who learn to live outside the box that have the most fun and stay together longer and happier.
Dress it Up, Just for the Fun of It: Dressing up boosts a woman's confidence. That we know is true. When he met you, you were going the distance to make yourself look good. Now the flip-flops, unruly hair and baggy clothes have taken center stage and you wonder why he's hesitant to touch you or compliment you. Yes, you are still beautiful just the way you are, but how is he supposed to see it underneath all the extra cloth and mass of untamed tresses?
Change Your Thinking About Sex! Now what more is there to say about that? If you don't get it, then I can't help you. Let the "bad" girl in you shine when the two of you are together. If he can't handle it, then you are with the wrong man. Run before you commit. A man should be helping to bring out the inner beast in you, not trying to tame it for his own selfish desires.
Run like the wind; before its too late. Do you have a sexy marriage/relationship or do you want to have a sexy marriage/relationship? Or maybe you just love this article? Please share it with your friends, and/or share your thoughts below…
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